The ongoing neoliberal restructuring of higher education has led to the growth of contingent and temporary non–tenure track faculty positions. Drawing on the rich and growing literature on the academic precarity produced from this contingent labor, this autoethnography examines how the author sought to find an academic home while navigating the neoliberal university. First, the author discusses autoethnography as a method of resistance and situates positionalities of precarity as a state of chronic instability. Second, the author details experiences as a contingent faculty member working in different institutions. This section includes dealing with heavy workloads, juggling multiple contracts, and handling self-doubt, guilt, fear, exhaustion, and disposability. The third section analyzes the internalization of these contingencies while handling bullying and microaggressions from students and colleagues. Last, the author discusses reflections and opportunities for transformational resistance in hopes to work toward a more equitable educational and working environment. As an Asian American academic, the author also aims to add a voice to under-represented faculty in the academy.

You do not currently have access to this content.