In this essay, I reflect on the events leading up to and immediately following the 2019 National Communication Association Organizational Communication Division's Top Paper Panel. In my reflection, I examine not only the events that happened, but also the role that my complacency played in my (lacking) preparation for pushback. In particular, I discuss how, in spite of my desire to be an ally for scholars of color, I had treated the problems facing marginalized scholars as an intellectual problem that was stripped of the emotional consequences. I conclude with a call to action to recognize complacency among white scholars as its own kind of violence.

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